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🎩 Customs & Etiquette

Dining Etiquette

social ritual

Dining Etiquette
Joseph Nash, public domain, via Wikimedia Commons
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A formal dinner was the great set piece of middle- and upper-class life, and it ran on rules as rigid as a court ceremony. Guests were seated by precedence, dressed for dinner, and expected to converse politely with the neighbors on either side while course followed course.

Mid-century, the fashion changed from service à la française — dishes laid out on the table all at once — to service à la russe, where footmen served each course in turn. The new style showed off the kitchen's range, but it also meant the meal's order, and everyone's place in it, was fixed in advance.

Dinner revealed the era's faith that manners were morals made visible. Knowing which fork to use, when to rise, and how to leave the table marked a person as genteel — and the elaborate choreography kept everyone, servants included, in exactly their place.

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